Battling the biscuits

December 1, 2008

In the last week I have spent an inordinate amount of time sitting on the sofa tapping away at my laptop in a vane effort to write an inspiring essay. As is my way with these things I successfully avoided doing a decent stint on the 3000 words of wisdom required by distracting myself with anything and everything. Checking email every 5 minutes (even though I knew there’d only be new junk mail and no matter how often I get offered the means to ‘enlarge my manhood’ it’s just not going to happen) tidying the kitchen, doing the washing, and even a spot of cleaning were just a few of my diversions. The biggest and most enticing was the biscuit tin, as a friend in the same predicament said “it keeps calling my name”. Now fortunately there was (note the past tense!) only a few slightly soft Garibaldi’s left, so not all of the waistline was lost.  BUT what I got to thinking about was after having surgery when I’m sat on my butt, incapacitated, possibly in pain, feeling sorry for myself cos I can’t go out and play any sport and bored cos everyone else is at work, what will the biscuits do then?  I can hear them enticing me now, whispering sweet nothings from the kitchen, they’ll be teasing me and no mistake; “come and eat us, we’ll be lovely with a cup of tea…. you know you want to” CUP OF TEA?! who do these biscuits think I am? I’ll be on crutches and able to make a cuppa, but will have to lurk in the kitchen to drink it cos a crutch in each hand is worth no tea in the lounge!   Darn it, I have standards, no biscuits and tea will be eaten while standing in the kitchen on one leg and all by myself, no, they must be dunked whilst sitting and relaxing. So what will I do? maybe a biscuit and tea making stash in the lounge is the way forward….hmmm something to ponder. Mind you that will definitely add inches to the waistline which, while I’m spectacularly inactive, I could do without.

What this is really all about is that fact that I will be having my first surgery in around 5 months time, and it’s starting to feel real. The realities of everyday life on one leg are just one small part of what’s in store that is playing on my mind. There’s so many really good blogs and information sites around that it’s a bit overwhelming….so why do I keep looking?!! Curiosity killed the cat, or so they say, keenness for knowledge might send me cuckoo me thinks.  So in a bid to rid myself of this internal churning over of surgery, the outcomes, the effect on my course ….etc etc I’ve feeling I need to ramble more often.  You have been warned!